1. |
Corn Liquor
02:04
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Corn liquor, corn liquor
I'm down to my last dime
Can't feel richer with a shot of corn liquor
And a pretty woman by my side
I'm going out stepping with brown-eyed Betty
She ain't no looker, it's true
But gimme corn liquor and I'll drink her pretty
Gonna turn them brown eyes blue
Makes. me feel alright, I wanna feel alright
Like I'm standing seven feet
That old corn liquor's gonna be the death of me
I got a little gal, cackles like a hen
Can't stand to be cooped up
Her mouth starts running like a headless chicken
Ain't nothing gonna hush her up
The doctor don'e endorse corn liquor
Says I'm bound to catch my death
Told that motha, I'll be six feet under
With corn liquor on my breath
Makes me feel alright, I wanna feel alright
Like I'm standing seven feet
That old corn liquor's gonna be the death of me
Corn Liquor
Corn liquor, corn liquor
I'm down to my last dime
Can't feel richer with a shot of corn liquor
And a pretty woman by your side
Want another shot of that good corn liquor
And a pretty woman by my side
Need another shot of that good corn liquor
And a pretty woman by my side
To make me feel alright and on the day I die
I'll be lit up like a Christmas tree
That old corn liquor's gonna be the death of me
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2. |
The Mustache Ride
02:29
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I mustache you a question, but my tongue is tied
Do you know how hairy things are bound to get
Once you've ridden on the mustache ride?
It's the mustache ride
You don't get no beef and gravy, no salad on the side
But you'll be back for seconds, baby
Once you've ridden on the mustache ride
It's the mustache ride
And it's a damn good time
I told you once and I told you twice
You oughta get you ticket to ride on the mustache ride
I ain't no Pentecostal preacher, but you might see the light
I'll be talking in tongues, baby, you'll be riding on the mustache ride
It's the mustache ride
I'm a licensed cunnilinguist, I teach my classes at night
You won't doubt my credentials, baby
Once you've ridden on the mustache ride
It's the mustache ride
Go on and get in line
I might be wrong but I'd wager I'm right
It's gonna tickle your fancy riding on the mustache ride
Good lord, this song is taking it's sweet time
My jaw is getting tight
Let me bring this tune to a climax, baby
Get off of the mustache ride
It's the mustache ride
And it's a damn good time
But the ride is closed, let's call it a night
I'll see you next time you ride on the mustache ride
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3. |
Trucker's Lament
03:32
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I feel asleep at the wheel in Bossier City
Eighteen wheels pushing sixty nearly belly up
Lord, I wish I was home in Cecilia's kitchen
Fixing greens and cutting up
I drank up my days like an endless ocean
On sipping whiskey and red port wine
I wanna drop her a line from this sleep deprived city
But it's been ten thousand miles since I could call her mine
Hundreds of highway flowers and truck stop showers
And over-the-counter methamphetamines
With Billy Joe Shaver and Roger Miller
To keep me awake and keep me company
The wheels are spinning, the CB's hissing
The gallon jug I piss in is full so I make a stop
And bum a couple of smokes and listen to the dirty jokes
From the truck stop bleached blonde girls out on the job
Now it's 3am at a Waffle House near Wichita Falls
The coffee's stale, the engine's cold
Cold as this chicken-fried dinner or them worn-out, old lot lizards
Been hauling a heavy gut, heavy heart, and heavy load
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4. |
Stagnant Waters
02:30
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I've been wading through stagnant waters as the willows weep
Hear the shrill call of the nightingale crying wolf from the sycamore trees
I've been wading through stagnant waters as the willows weep
Pretty girls and the grinning reaper, they come and go
Maybe it's just the whiskey talking or the shimmer of her sun-bleached bones
But pretty girls and the grinning reaper, they come and go
There's pomade in the devil's hair, slinging snake oil cures
Hot sands and bleeding horses, red dirt and rusted spurs
There's pomade in the devil's hair, slinging snake oil cures
I'm gonna drive a Hearse through this one-horse-town till I rise, like a phoenix, I rise
Engine steam and tobacco teeth, shaking the cold, clammy hand of Time
I'm gonna drive a Hearse through this one-horse-town till I rise, like a phoenix, I rise
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5. |
PBR, Whiskey, and Pot
03:31
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PBR, whiskey, and pot
Darlin, that's all I got
But it was always enough to keep you here
Hell, they all just let me down
Leave me wandering round this town
Like a rabid dog that's too damn crazy to care
I know they're gonna leave me low and lonesome
They all seem to leave me so damn blue
PBR, whiskey, and pot, and you
That water tower looms
Like some rusted, dead, old moon
I swear this whole town's lit by a lonesome 40 watt bulb
I got this coalminer's grin
From a couple fights we was in
You smashed the lamp on the wall and the vase against my skull
I know they're gonna leave me low and lonesome
They all seem to leave me so damn blue
PBR, whiskey, and pot, and you
I got that letter that you sent
For a carton of cigarettes
And a couple of bucks to get you through the end of the week
But PBR, whiskey, and pot
That's always all I got
And some lonesome songs to keep me company
I know they're gonna leave me low and lonesome
They all seem to leave me so damn blue
PBR, whiskey, and pot, and you
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6. |
Sugarmama
02:17
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I'm broke, flat busted, down on my luck
Wish I had a fortune but I ain't got a buck
I need to find me a girl with expensive tastes
Need to get a sugarmama, got bills I need to pay
I don't care if she's haggard, a mean old bird
Long as she's got lots of money to burn
I'm gonna put some honey, I'll put it in her pot
I need to get a sugarmama, need to take her for all she's got
Even old, rich broads, even they got needs
The last time I checked, money don't grow on trees
So if the price is right, I'm gonna do the deed
I'll get a sugarmama grinning, all the while I'll be gritting my teeth
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7. |
Tear It Up
02:35
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You might think that you're running with the bulls
Baby, you're just running with some local fools
You been running wild with a bad, bad crowd
Running as fast as you run your mouth
Baby, shut up, let's tear this damn place up
I been everywhere east of Aberdeen
And you're bout the cutest damn thing I seen
Wanna show you off, gonna take you out
You start to run your mouth, I'm gonna wear you out
Baby, shut up, let's tear this damn place up
Baby, you might catch me running around
Chasing some skirt on the outskirts of town
Don't get your panties in a knot, girl, she don't mean a thing
Anyway, you ain't wearing no diamond ring
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8. |
Weather the Storm
03:31
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What matters most is how you weather the storm
Will you holler back when you hear that thunder roar?
Or will you run for cover, someplace safe and warm?
What matters most is how you weather the storm
Through the falling snow and the shaken dust
And the tides of the shapeshifting moon
Ashes to ashes, and rust to rust
You'll remember what I said to you
That what matters most is how you weather the storm
So don't take forsaken what you're aching for
Cast off your burdens and your crown of thorns
What matters most is how you weather the storm
One path is winding and one is straight
And they often intertwine
So don't get discouraged if you're led astray
You'll find your way home in time
What matters most is how you weather the storm
Will you run for the hills when you hear that thunder roar?
Or will you find courage you'd never found before?
What matters most is how you weather the storm
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9. |
Choke That Chicken
01:43
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Choke that chicken, baby, choke that chicken good
Choke that chicken, baby, gotta choke that chicken good
If you want chicken for dinner, honey, what did you expect?
Gotta get your hands dirty, girl, gotta wring that chicken's neck
Choke that chicken, baby, choke that chicken good
Choke that chicken, baby, better choke that chicken good
That chicken ain't gonna wring itself, better get it before it's good and gone
Get them feathers flying before there's chicken frying and you're gnawing on a chicken bone
Choke that chicken, baby, choke that chicken good
Choke that chicken, baby, better choke that chicken good
You're licking your chops, eyeing that cock-a-doodle do you have an appetite?
Cause there ain't nothing better than chicken for dinner, a little white gravy on the side
Choke that chicken, baby, choke that chicken good
Choke that chicken, baby, better choke that chicken good
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10. |
Dry Out
02:36
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Dry out, they say I should dry out
Take some time off to straighten my shit out
Don't know what they're talking bout
Ain't nothing to straighten out
And when things start going south
I reckon it's high time to dry out
Another digester martyr
Another cross to bear
But at least in Hell, I know all my friends will be there
Dry out, maybe I should dry out
Take some time off to figure my shit out
Been feeling so burnt out on self-pity and self-doubt
And when things start going south
I reckon it's high time to dry out
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11. |
Vagabond Blues
04:19
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I nudged the needle off the phonograph record
I couldn't stand that lonesome song no more
The sound of sorrow used to make me feel better
But anymore, it just leaves me feeling worse
So I'm gonna leave that life behind
Dust off my seersucker suit, patch the holes with needle and twine
I ain't gonna sing another song about losing my mind
I'm gonna kiss them vagabond blues goodbye
I used to drink bourbon for breakfast
With the devil, like a dog, nipping at my heels
Life ain't worth nothing when you're young, wild, and reckless
Out breaking hearts like strings on an old guitar
So I'm gonna leave that life behind
Maybe shake some dust in a county that is dry
Quit drinking coffee and gas station wine
I'm gonna kiss them vagabond blues goodbye
Now I got a new song I been strumming
You can see right through it like the cracks in my floorboards
It's just some forgotten, borrowed tune that I been humming
It ain't like nothing I ever sung before
Cause I up and left that life behind
Found me a sweetheart to stand by my side
We went down to the courthouse and got a marriage license signed
I up and kissed them vagabond blues goodbye, my honeypie
I puckered up and kissed them vagabond blues goodbye
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